Dream #14

It was nighttime and the stars were out. I came upon the ocean - I was on the top of a hill or the edge of a ridge or some such, so I was looking out over a bit of land, with the ocean beyond. And right at the edge of the beach was this glorious garden and I knew that someone had made it just for me. It was like the old British gardens, or like that greek border pattern - a bit mazelike, different sections following paths. And as I looked on, starting from the left to the right, it started to bloom before my eyes, like dominoes. And each different intertwining line was a different flower, a different line of dominoes to fall, so that it was like this beautiful choreographed dance of all these different paths of flowers. And each different kind of flower was a different color - the most saturated colors I've ever seen: fuchsia, deep purple, royal blue, yellow, fire orange. And the garden was in sections, as though one had four or five different areas of a garden cordoned off but right next to one another. And as each section finished blooming, the body of a seahorse would appear on top, much larger than reality, and dead. But it wasn't at all morbid. It was remarkably beautiful, in fact, and filled me with a great deal of peace. And after it was all done, I just remember feeling so absolutely loved - more than I've ever felt in life. Love without doubt or anxiety - just the complete knowledge of being fully loved. Because someone had choreographed this whole thing just for me.

Dream #13

The Mouse Man: A Six-Year-Old-Girl’s Nightmare

I am on a college campus, feeling very lost.  I can’t quite tell if I’m still the six-year-old I was when I crawled into bed for the night or if I’m far older.  Could I have missed growing up?  Do I belong in college now?  Either way - I am sure I don’t belong in this college cafeteria.

I look around the room as big as gymnasium, filled with people.  But there is something not quite right about them… something is off.   It takes me a moment to realize what the problem is, and when I do – I want to run.  My whole self needs to bolt out of any door I can find.  The only problem is, my feet will not move an inch.  

So I stand and stare - every single person in the room has the head of an animal!   

I see a woman with the head of a cat, and there is a man with the head of a buffalo, I see a dog person, and even a turtle’s face.  I see snake people and gorilla people, and animals I can’t even recognize.  

I find myself looking at the back of a particularly fuzzy head; it has grey fur and rounded ears.  But when he turns around - my feet can’t stop me, and I do run.  I run as fast as I can.   He has the head of a mouse, and the fear that courses through me gives me the jolt I need to get out of that place.  But I have no idea why this mouse is so terrifying.  I just know he is coming after me.

I run to the edge of campus, into the town.   My breath is coming heavy as I reach a house and run through the front door.   I lean against the door trying to catch my breath, but I can hear, or maybe feel the Mouse Man behind me.  He is definitely after me.  He is follows me through the strangers’ home as I run up the stairs.  I know he is so close, just a few steps away and all I can do to escape is to crawl out of a second floor window and slide down the roof, falling hard onto the grass.  At least I land on my feet

 I hit the ground running.  I am terrified and still wondering why this Mouse Man is chasing me.  It doesn’t matter, I know he is trying to get me, and he is not a good man.  He is everything I do not want to be.

As I am run into an open field a crowd of animal headed people grows around me.  The only one who I am afraid of is the Mouse Man.  I know that if he reaches me, if he touches me, my world will end.  I don’t know if his touch will kill me, but I know if he does touch me, my life as I know it, as I want it to be, will be over.  

The crowd parts, and I see him coming towards me, and the crowd is too thick.  There is no escape; there is no way I can get away from him.  So I turn to face him.  I know there is only one thing I can do.  

I reach out my hand to touch him, before he can touch me.  I watch my hand reach out and touch his arm, and I see his mouse face fall away to reveal a human face I recognize, but can’t believe. The Mouse Man, my nightmare and my biggest fear has become my father.

Dream #12

I see a line of bottle dolls cascading across a shelf and falling in slow, deliberate motion off the edge.  Following each other like lemmings off a cliff.  They are all awkward bottle shapes with solid bodies - you wonder how they could walk in anything other than a shuffle.  Some of them have doors and windows cut out of their torsos with different scenes in each one - like a series of clotheslines strung between apartment building windows, a red umbrella floating against a sea of clouds.  A rain of keys and odd bronze objects - gears and unidentifiable components.  I know there are more but I can't tell what they are. Buoyant, silly and sad.  I don't know whether to laugh or cry.  

Dream #11

I had a vision of an a African style mask called the Ragman.  The face was angry and austere with slashed cheeks and oval eyes. Ochre and earthtones mixed with stark red and white. The face is in the middle of a large cross within a 3/4 circle with multi-colored rags hanging from the the free arm of the cross - the section without the circle.  He's a rag and bone man.  Collecting pieces of the dead before they are dust and ashes. He's the color of their lives as they enter the ground. 

Dream # 10

I had gone to see a show in a large, old theatre, draping red curtains - the works. There were no stairs thought.  People sat on blankets as if in the park.  I dozed off lying down waiting for the show to start. I woke up with my back against a large wooden post on a dock in New Orleans.  I could hear birds and ocean waves would occasionally come up and splash against me.

As I look around I see Stephanie approaching, seeming surprised to find me where I was, but not so surprised that I was in New Orleans.  She is carrying a sandwich she made for herself, but she offers me half. We talk for a little bit and I start to get up.  We walk towards the house she is staying at.  It's more of a rusted warehouse/factory with a chain-link fence on the outside. The inside, however, is fixed up very nicely.  Carpet, christmas lights run along door frames for added light.  Sliding doors that lead to the back, facing the ocean.  The kitchen was the nicest with a faucet that just barely landed in the sink.  A lot of splash would run down the island into a moat of sorts at the bottom that in turn led to a secondary drain.  

I explain to Stephanie that I have no idea how I got to New Orleans.  She doesn't have a n explanation either.  But, what she does know is that, while she's happy to see me and to have me visit, I can't stay with her as it might make her roommate uncomfortable and she promised the people she was house-sitting for, no overnight guests.  

Not knowing why or how I was there, I make my way into town and look for a possible job so I can save up to go home. Madison sends word to me that her parents said I "need to get back up here" ASAP. I don't know why she or her parents care. We aren't close. I'm now in a downtown shopping district. Tall old buildings sort of boxed in together on cobblestone.  Doug's parents show up.  We walk into one of the buildings only to be entering a mall. There aren't a lot of people.  The stores all look upscale. I, of course, choose to wander the terribly unorganized comic book store where they also sell second-hand music, movies, and old dog video games.

One of the stores was a full-immersion, surround-sound and picture entertainment booth. I checked it out. There was a family of dirt racing enthusiasts inside watching a back road race from the point-of-view of the inside of one of the cars. The family was very vocal regarding their opinion of each driver. I watched as, after a certain point on the track, each driver had to spin their car around while maintaining speed and drive backwards.

A large blue farming vehicle then came out from a field onto the road forcing all the racers to maneuver around it. The care we were viewing from began to spin as to go backwards. I stepped out only to find myself in a restaurant, a fancy one, with two friends. A girl is with her friend at a neighboring table and they are being loud and obnoxious.  My one friend approaches them to ask them to quiet down some.  They encourage him to "make them" so they leave to get a room.

I then wake up back in the theater. The show has started. It's almost like End Days except that it's a musical and Katie is playing a hyper-religious Jesus freak with a scrapbook of all his words. 

After the show, I go to step outside to find my other friend from the restaurant in his car telling me we needed to go get our first friend from his hotel. The hotel is a dive. The doorman tells me my friend is on the thirteenth floor.  I take the elevator. The doors strain and never fully close. I watch floors go 34. I'm between the fourth and fifth floor when the cables begin to whine.  The elevator doesn't drop me but it's basically slipping down to the basement where the gym is.  My other friend ended up there too.  We race up the stairs to thirteen where there's a pool with jungle plants and such around it.  Vines everywhere. We find our first friend, bummed that he tricked himself into paying for sex.  Again. Then Katie appears still in costume form her show. She is explaining her character choices to an old couple, whom I'm guessing saw the show.  I tell her how great she was and leave. 

Now I'm sitting on the roof of Stephanie's aluminum warehouse.  She sits with me and we watch the sunset over the tree-line past the water.  I still don't know why New Orleans. I don't know why her. She rests her back against my chest. I lean over her shoulder and whisper in her ear "I think I'm okay with this."

Dream #9

I was a child tied up an left on the train tracks. I wasn't alone. Upon rolling between two sets of train tracks I saw a variable set of children tied up and tossed away like trash.

As the trains sped past with roaring speed, other children rode in the comfort of their warmth. They would look out the windows, almost reaching to pull me in, but they could never get hold. 

Dream #8

Two friends and I are walking up a hill from a mountain road. At the top of the hill is the back of a movie theater, we must have been headed to see something.  Then figures begin to appear in the woods.  we are being chased by our dopplegangers.

Dream # 6

I was at home and I was getting threatening voice messages. "Get Out" "You don't belong here" " We're gonna get you" very horror movie. Finally it dawned on me. OH these people have the wrong phone number. They can't be talking about me. I didn't do anything wrong. 

It was specific about the apartment too, I remember that. They were angry that I was living there. 

Later that night I had to run an errand. I thought to myself. I'm gonna call these angry people back when I get home and explain to them they've made a mistake... right after I got get some milk or bread or whatever it was I had to leave for. 

I went to the store, came back and there was a 20 something year old in front of me with a winter cap on as I was trying to get inside my apartment. He was kind of in my way and I remember thinking. He's a little close for my liking. And then he kind of dipped toward me and my hand went up in my own defense. Then I started to laugh at myself. This poor kid must think I'm a nut job. "Sorry." I said. "I'm just a little nervous tonight"

I remember he was looking around me, not at me. Wouldnt' make eye contact... until he did. Looked right at me. I looked down and saw he was holding a short knife of some kind and he said..."I'm sorry" before he stabbed me in the side. Then I realized everyone around me was closing in. They must have been following me or something. 

It didn't hurt. I wasn't scared. I was in complete peace. My brain just switched off or something. I wasn't even angry that I got stabbed. I felt like I immediately needed to forgive him. I remember thinking. This must be the peace they talk about when you drown to death OR perhaps when people are getting raped they can switch their brains off like this. I found it oddly fascinating. 

Dream #5

The other night I dreamt that I was teaching a Laban workshop in the middle of a park in Australia. As I was explaining an exercise, dark storm clouds appeared and hovered directly over the trees in the park - so that there would be a tree with it's own swirling dark storm cloud above it, then blue sky until the next tree with a dark swirling storm cloud and so on, but only when I was facing forward. When I turned around to look behind me there was perfect blue sky. So I turned the class around so that I was facing the blue sky. But as soon as I did that the storm clouds would circle the trees that were directly in my line of sight. BUT they had disappeared from behind me. I kept turning around to face the blue sky but every time I did so the coulds would follow so they never left my direct line of sight. Strange.....

Dream #4

Once I had a dream that I saw a plane crash and was kind of watching from behind the glass of an aquarium as the plane descended into the ocean. I then watched a shark come along and circle the plane, waiting to eat any survivors.....

Dream #3

The shark dream: My recurring shark dream has evolved over the years. It always begins in the same way. I am either in a boat or on a jetty and somehow end up in the water. For some reason the boat/jetty disappears and I can't swim anywhere, and I know there is something lurking beneath me. It used to get to the stage where the shark would lunge at me which would wake me up. It then evolved to me knowing what was going to happen and being able to wake myself up before the shark appears. Now I actually am either standing on the beach or on the pier and watch someone else being attacked.

Dream # 2

I am walking down the street in Israel wearing a 40’s style dress in a vivid large floral print in two shades of purple, very big flowers, there is a narrow paten black belt with a small bow in the center. I am wearing a small brimmed black straw, dressy, hat.